How to deal with dominating people.

06 Oct 2009 13 Comments

by rumasen77 in Survival in Human Society.

              " Forget about World Peace. You are very small. Look after those around you.

                If you can’t look after those around you, look after yourself.

                If you can’t look after yourself, ask for help."

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            Have you ever encountered a person who is dominating? Dominance comes in many forms. Some dominating people come across as silent observers, contributing little to conversations or group discussions. Often, they lack facial expression. It is only later that they try to hit back, and are capable of making situations very tricky and difficult.

             Dominating people try to find faults in others. They cannot be talked to reasonably, and are hot-headed, rude, argumentative and aggressive individuals. It is debatable whether dominating people are actually courageous or brave. Mostly, they desire to be the centre of attention and will achieve their aims at any cost. Negative dominance means when a person is trying to take away something from you: your morale, your self esteem, or a possibly blossoming relationship. Unlike a person with "leadership qualities", in which a dominating or strong personality has a positive influence on a group of people and binds them together, a negatively inclined dominating people will shun relationships, and most often than not, be a jealous, envious or evil person.

              Whether it  is your boss, a friend, or a relative, try to remain calm in the face of a dominating person or a situation which is threatening to flare up into a full fledged battle of wits. They will try to put you down and may even go all out to publicly humiliate you. Seldom aware of being respectful, they behave like charging bulls, and do not possess very great restraining powers. Handle the situation with care: and in this case, the word "care" mostly means….do not react. At the same time, do not show that you are being intimidated. Insults will be hurled freely at you, and under unpredicatable circumstances. Like the Boy Scouts’ motto, always, ‘Be Prepared.’. But do not stoop to their low levels…..or else all will be lost.

              Negatively dominating people are overcome with an inferiority complex and hence will act extra sensitive and touchy. In their quest for dominating the moment, they may quote you out of context (they have extraordinarily good memories) or twist your words to mean something which you hadn’t ever intended or meant. Naturaly, the intention is to provoke. Do not be provoked. Do not react. Be firm and calm, yet show your superior personality by not losing your dignity, self esteem and balance. Remind yourself that you are dealing with a totally irrational human being, who is out to get you.

                If you play into the hands of an aggressive-dominating type, you will be harming yourself and relations with people whom you actually love, for these people try to hit out where it hurts the most. Relationships suffer and you are looking at the bigger picture, remember?

Say affirmative things to yourself, and always stay alert when you sense that the conversation is going the wrong way. Take control of dominating people by remaining in control of yourself. Best of luck!

                                                      

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